theartsdesk Q&A: Indian star Radhika Apte on 'Sister Midnight'

Radhika Apte has been acclaimed for her ebullient performance as a reluctant bride in Sister Midnight since director Karan Kandhari’s comic horror movie was launched at Cannes last May. 

Talking over Zoom from her home near Epping Forest, Apte, 38, quickly stresses that it wasn’t the film's topic of arranged marriage that made her sign up for Kandhari’s feature debut. What she loved about his script, she says, “is the wild and weirdly wonderful way it tackles the feeling of not fitting in, and the eventual journey of accepting oneself as one is with all the imperfections.”

Apte’s Uma demonstrates increasingly awkward and misanthropic behavior as she navigates a relationship she didn’t want in a city – Mumbai – she doesn't know. Apte plays Uma fearlessly and funny to her bones while conveying the doubt and unease that comes with learning that it's impossible to escape the mind's traps by simply wishing them away. 

Apte, too, had a tough time in Mumbai when she moved there following a sheltered liberal childhood in Pune as the daughter of two doctors. In 2012, she married the London-based violinist-composer Benedict Taylor and now divides her time between the two cities.

Bringing her electrifying talent and disarming vitality to both independent films and Bollywood, Apte has established herself as a versatile actor in India, while Sister Midnight earned her her first Best Actress nod at the British Independent Film Awards. Here, she explains what the film means to her. 
 
PAMELA JAHN: What's the secret of a good marriage?

RADHIKA APTE: Respect and freedom, definitely. [Partners] giving each other the space to be themselves, and to change over a period of time. 

At the beginning of the film, Uma seems at a loss as a newlywed, sitting next to her husband on the bed in their tiny home. What’s going through her mind? 

She doesn't know what is to be done next. But it's not like she's somebody who doesn't think things through. There's no manual of how to be in a marriage, no one told her how things would go. It's a very specific momentary feeling of uncertainty. 

What kind of person is Uma to you? 

She's a misfit who becomes an accidental outlaw, somebody who questions everything and who's very pure. She has a kind of childlike innocence and intensity in her. And she's the complete opposite of what is expected from a woman in the patriarchal system in India, in terms of what it means to be a good bride and a devoted wife. [Pictured below: Radhika Apte, Ashok Pathak]

Is that what attracted you to the role?

No, I was just excited about how crazy and strange the film was. It's a fiercely feminist story, but it's not even just about Uma. Her husband Gopal, played by Ashok Pathak, is equally a feminist character in the way his part is written and the development he goes through.  

Is the feeling of being an outsider something you relate to?

Absolutely. People are born into a certain society and they're taught a certain way of being. You grow up seeing your parents take on certain roles, and you learn from them. The trouble starts when you're trying to find your own place, to figure out who you want to be and discover your own identity. Suddenly you start fighting against the same norms that you've taken for granted all this time. But there's also always that fear of getting abandoned, of being left out. And that's the real challenge: Learning to stand up for yourself and to say, “No, I am this person, I have to accept who I am, and I will fight the battle.”

You deliberately stepped out of the world you grew up in as you moved to the UK. Did your family encourage your decision?

I was very lucky. There was complete freedom at home for making choices. I even went to one of the first experimental schools in India, where they really insisted on children asking questions and not following blindly what they were told. So I've always had that seed planted in me, thanks to my upbringing and education. But there came a point where I would literally speak against everything. I became the difficult girl, then the difficult woman, because I would argue all the time, and I still do. Some people in my family thought that I would never find anybody to be with because I was so intricate.  

How did your time studying at Trinity Laban [Conservatoire of Music and Dance in Greenwich, London] shape your personality? 

I was amazed by all the fascinating life stories I encountered. That makes you feel that you're not alone. But having said all that, I do love Pune, the place where I come from, and I still stand by the value system I grew up with in many regards. I'm very proud of it. So it's not all negative – it’s a mixed bag.

Sister Midnight is set in Mumbai. Uma and her surroundings seem to mirror each other.

Yeah. When we started filming, I felt like Uma was also the city in a way because, on the one hand, Mumbai's such a genuine, almost naive place. At the same time, there are so many people coming from everywhere. It is overpopulated, it’s filthy, it's polluted, it's mega-chaotic. But, still, I think there's something about Mumbai that resembled Uma. 

What’s your relationship to the city?

I now live in Mumbai as well as in London. But I do have a love-hate relationship with the place. The first time I went to live there, I got very depressed. I left because it's such a ginormous city. It’s so fast-paced that I completely lost myself, and it was only when I found friends, exactly like Uma in the film, that Mumbai suddenly became home. The spirit of the people there is incredible. 

How does that compare to your life in London?

My lifestyle here is very quiet and calm. Only when I go back to India is it chaotic. I work on adrenaline over there, and I love it. I think I'm taking in the best of both worlds at the moment.

You work in independent film but also in mainstream productions in India. Is that by choice or necessity?

When you commit to independent cinema only, it's hard to pay the bills. Most of the time, you have to find a balance between the two so that you can make a living as an actor with a family. That does not mean I take on any role that is being offered to me. I'm very mindful of the projects I choose. I never participated in projects that support values that I don't stand for. The few times where it looks like I wasn’t being selective was when they changed the script and I had no say in it. 

Did you ever feel that speaking out would hurt your career?

Yes, lots of times, and I've been told that I'm done, but here I am. At the same time, it has had an effect on my work for sure. It's always mutual.

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